


Nights at the Griffith

by aglikethemetal



Category: Agent Carter (TV), Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. References, Awesome Peggy Carter, BAMF Peggy Carter, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Howling Commandos - Freeform, Past Peggy Carter/Steve Rogers, Post-Captain America: The First Avenger, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-World War II, The Griffith
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-04
Updated: 2015-02-04
Packaged: 2018-03-10 10:53:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3287606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aglikethemetal/pseuds/aglikethemetal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was during the night that she struggled the most. After years of wartime service, with constant bombings on the front lines or just general music and chatter noise from the many people around her, the Griffith seemed much too silent.<br/>Or<br/>How Peggy feels about various things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nights at the Griffith

**Author's Note:**

> Just some thoughts and musings about Peggy and what she might be thinking in Marvel's Agent Carter. Watch it! Thanks to my lovely beta (who wishes to remain anonymous). Disclaimer: I unfortunately do not own any of the characters or references....

It was during the night that she struggled the most. After years of wartime service, with constant bombings on the front lines or just general music and chatter noise from the many people around her, the Griffith seemed much too silent. Sure, New York was not a quiet city, and her fellow residents were known to make noise, yet Peggy missed the comfort of the flow of sound, and energy, and progress.

It was on nights such as these when she hurt the most. Blood and bodies, nazi experiments, the ringing in her ears from war all came surging back with a rush of pain, guilt, horror, disgust, and rage. The sound of Steve's voice as it crackled away with the dying radio, two crosses together - one labelled James Buchanan Barnes, the other, Steven Grant Rogers - the folded flag that was pressed into her hands which currently sat in the top of her closet. Memories of touches she could still feel, hands on her back or in her hand gently squeezing in a show of support and shared grief, the shaking of Rebecca Barnes' shoulders as Peggy held on to her while they stood together at the empty grave. The trembling of the caged woman from doctor Reinhardt's prison, scents of decaying flesh, festering wounds, sweaty men; all of it haunted Peggy in the dark hours of the night.

It was paralyzingly painful, yet she could shed no more tears. The past could not be altered, so she was left struggling in this world that needed her but pushed her away still. All the progress she had made during the war, all the respect she had gained, most days in the SSR had been revoked. She smiled as she thought of Steve and his fear of her in their first meetings. Oh, how the men in her office would view her had they known that The Captain America had held her in such high regard.   


And her Howling Commandos, how they would laugh at the things she was told - or perhaps they would be enraged by it - but they would never question her ability to excel at her work. It was the memory of those she had lost and those who were just not here that inspired her. She must keep going, keep pushing for what she knew she was capable of, for herself and for those who believed in her.

So in the nights when the past came back to her harshly, and the present inspired rage and even more determination, she would seek to continue. She would strive to be there to protect the world. Peggy would be the shield that the world needed, regardless of if they wanted her to be it.  


**Author's Note:**

> I hope you are watching this show. Leave a comment below or find me at my tumblr (i-am-an-0-8-4) to discuss everything Peggy and Marvel:)


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